Recently I Considered Plastic Surgery

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By Jessica Harris | Guest Blogger | Founder of Beggar’s Daughter

I cannot recall ever having body image issues. Even after years of watching bronzed, silicon porn stars, I didn’t truly feel inadequate. I’m not sure if I was just ignorant or if some part of me understood that they weren’t real.

Some girls struggle with comparing themselves to the women in magazines. I just wasn’t one of those girls. For whatever reason, I made it out of high school and through college without struggling with the self-image issues that can plague so many women.

In fact, I was very confident in my body. When I go out and speak on modesty, I give my reasons for being modest, and they have nothing to do with causing my brother to stumble. I dress modestly because I am convinced that I have a good body and I want my husband’s jaw to hit the floor on our wedding night. Is that prideful?  Maybe that’s prideful…

One word changed that all: Undesirable. 

I was looking for a better-fitting bra. No joke. What woman doesn’t have a hard time finding bras that actually fit? In that process, I found out that I actually have a deformity. It wasn’t a big deal to me. I felt like I was still within the range of normal. I’ve lived with my body for nearly 28 years, have had multiple roommates and changed in locker rooms and never once felt I was different.

I can live with deformities. I actually have a couple throughout my body. It doesn’t mean you look weird, it just means that didn’t form the way the textbook says it should. So deformity, while it is a harsh word, doesn’t bother me. We all have some sort of deformity. Yes, even you.

Undesirable.

That takes deformity to a whole new level.  It says, You aren’t formed correctly and the way you are formed is unacceptable. It’s ugly.

I researched myself into a depressed state. Every page, video, and forum recommended plastic surgery. There were horror stories of women afraid to be naked in front of their husbands. Forums were dedicated to encourage each other to stay strong while saving up for plastic surgery, as if it was some sort of life-threatening illness.

In fact, in the UK, I could get free plastic surgery to correct my deformity, and if I don’t get plastic surgery they recommend I seek counseling. Counseling.

My confidence in my body was completely rattled.

There I sat struggling with body image issues I didn’t even know I was supposed to have until 10 minutes earlier. That was a long night, but I finally found a video of a woman living with this deformity on only one side of her body. She had contemplated plastic surgery herself and had actually worn a prosthetic breast to feel more normal. She doesn’t anymore, and you know why? Because her husband doesn’t care.

In fact, that was the response I saw from many men. The vast majority prefer us women just the way we are, not pumped up, stitched up, or pushed up. The only people who saw my condition as undesirable were the plastic surgeons and other women. That realization helped snap me out of my funk.

My bout with body image issues was very short-lived. I know some of you struggle intensely with that, but I want you to hear a new message. I want you to understand that the difference in our bodies illustrates the creativity of our God. Our differences are His glory. Don’t let anyone ever tell you that you are undesirable. As women, our bodies are beautiful. It doesn’t matter the shape, the size, stretch marks, cup size, or BMI. We are created in the image of God. God created us.

There is no way a surgeon can outdo God.

P.S. You are enough.

Jessica is the founder of Beggar’s Daughter, which helps women on their journey of recovery from sexual addictions. Please visit her website  – Beggar’s Daughter. And “like” her facebook page to stay up to date with the amazing things she is doing.

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