An Easter Egg Hunt of Redemption
By Maura Preszler
On Holy Saturday I went to Target to get some Easter gifts for our two little boys. I know a little last minute but it could have been worse (busy mom life). We have two boys, Pio just turned 3 last week and Noah is 22 months.
It brings me so much joy to pick out treats for them and fill their eggs and Easter baskets. I love to see them smile and looked forward to Easter morning. Pio and Noah are 14 months apart so their is a tremendous amount of competition (one could call it fighting) between them. Which translates to mostly Pio making sure Noah doesn’t have anything bigger or “better” than him. So I made sure to pick out the same gifts for each of them to eliminate any fighting over Easter toys.
Even though their Easter baskets, treats and toys were identical it was funny to see Pio reach over to make sure Noah didn’t have anything he didn’t have in his basket.
We went to Easter Mass together, then to a friend’s house for brunch. After brunch and an Easter egg hunt we went home so the boys could nap (and let’s be real so I could nap too). Then we went to another friend’s house for dinner. It was a beautiful day.
That night as my husband and I were saying prayers in bed before drifting off to sleep he asked me what I was grateful for. I always seem to fall asleep before we finish prayers but that night was different. I had tears in my eyes and told him, I’m thankful that Pio and Noah will never have anxiety over an Easter egg hunt of wonder if you are going to hide their Easter eggs. Michael held me really close and whispered, me too.
I grew up in a very dysfunctional home and every year I got tremendous anxiety on the weeks and days leading up to Easter. Their was a neighborhood Easter egg hunt on Holy Saturday every year and I never knew if my dad was going to hide our Easter eggs or not. If my mom and dad were fighting he would take his anger out on us by threatening not to hide our eggs. It might not seem like a big deal but to a little girl it was so hurtful and damaging.
I remember feeling so sick to my stomach and not being able to eat because I was so nervous about the Easter eggs. I didn’t know what anxiety was but I definitely know now that it was anxiety. I was plagued with anxiety as a little girl and teenager.
I had tears of joy in my eyes because I’m so exceedingly grateful that Pio and Noah (and our future children) will never feel anxiety over if their dad is going to hide their Easter eggs or not. I’m so thankful they will never have to know that pain.
I know they are going to experience pain, loss and anxiety in their lives but I’m so happy it won’t be over something as innocent as an Easter egg hunt.
I’m so thankful that I had the courage to move away, go to therapy, take medication, work three jobs to pay for the care I needed, do the hard work, cry, grieve and heal. Easter is such a special redemption song. And as I watched my little precious boys run after their Easter eggs it filled my heart with so much JOY to see them. I’m grateful for the pain because it lead me to the beauty which is now my life. Sure, being a wife and mother is HARD work. But I wouldn’t want to be doing anything else.
I want to encourage you to fight for what you want. When I was in therapy I would close my eyes and envision the life I wanted to have. Thank you Jesus, I have that life now. And God desires to give that to you too. I promise you this, the Lord can not be outdone in generosity.
Give Him your pain, show up, do the hard work and let him surprise you with a life more beautiful than you can imagine.
P.S. You are enough.