“I just wanted a dad,” she said.

august 26

Photo by Effie Grey Photography

By Maura Byrne | Founder of Made in His Image

During the past two years of speaking with victims and survivors of physical and sexual abuse, countless women have disclosed their stories to me, many for the first time. My heart has expanded with extreme sensitivity and compassion towards these women, as I have learned of the sufferings they have and continue to endure, many by the hands of their fathers. The statistics regarding fathers in relation to domestic violence and sexual assault are both devastating and astronomical.

A father is an irreplaceable person in a child’s life. Statistics show that children who grow up lacking the presence of a loving father are more at risk to develop and engage in destructive behaviors such as, depression, self-harm, eating disorders, alcoholism, promiscuity and the like. With that being said, a child can certainly still suffer from one of the above, with the influence of a loving father.

A young woman told me, I just wanted a dad. I feel so alone. What do I do? I am certainly no expert. But a man who I trust and admire very much once told me that when faced with suffering, there are two choices: you can despair or choose to see beauty. And MIHI desires to inspire you to choose the latter.

I’m not saying it will be rainbows and butterflies. It’s okay to be afraid, angry, and to feel countless other emotions associated with suffering, abuse and loss. But do not allow yourself to despair, choose instead to seek beauty amidst the ambiguity of life. In a circumstance like this you have to make the choice to see beauty and to focus on the future and not the past. Because the past can’t be undone, but the future is yours to discover.

I encourage you to go watch one of my favorite movies, The Human Experience. The documentary seeks to discover the meaning of life. And yearns to answer questions such as, Who am I? Why am I here? Where am I going? What is my purpose in life?

The main actor, Jeffrey Azize, struck my heart. Several times during the movie he talks about his childhood, and how he seeks to forgive and show mercy to those who have hurt him. There where two scenes that moved me to tears. One time he is being filmed in a taxi in New York City, as he gazes out the window he talks about how challenging it was to feel and experience love, when the ones who were supposed to love and care for him, fell from grace and harmed him. It was exceedingly profound! In another scene he meets his father, after years of separation and embraces him. Jeffrey’s love for his father mirrors God the Father’s love for us – it was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. To love those who have harmed us, is to reflect the Father’s love. And this my friends is our mission in life.

And tonight if you should feel alone, isolated from those you love or frustrated because you feel as if no one understand your pain, then turn to our Heavenly Father and tell Him your feelings, for He does understand, and sees all things. He is waiting for you to come to Him. Throw yourself into His Arms and let Him hold you through the pain.

There is a loving, gentle, merciful and compassionate Father who will never leave you. You are precious to Him. He adores you so. This is His promise to you: Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you. – Hebrews 13:5

P.S. You’re enough.

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