Life Is Not Fair
By Erin McNew | Staff Writer
Photo Credit | Donna Irene Photography
In life I think we experience about a thousand things that aren’t fair. People subtract themselves from our lives without warning. People hurt us without justification. People overlook our uniqueness and treat us like we’re replaceable. People fail to value us.
Life is hard. It hurts. And you just never know when or where it’s going to remind you that you aren’t really in control. In fact, sometimes I feel like it’s those moments when we feel the most in control that God chooses to remind us that we’re not. Sometimes we just have to have the ground ripped from underneath us to remind us to stop looking down at it and start looking up to higher things.
Some days are awful. But we have about a hundred good ones in their wake. We have a hundred good ones to give us memories to hold onto when people leave us. We have a hundred good ones to learn from. And we have a hundred good ones to think about when life smacks us in the back of the head.
Life changes so fast. It literally happens in a moment. And sometimes all it takes is that moment to prevent us from ever going back to the way things were. I revel in those moments. I revel in those moments that give me something to hold onto in the aftermath of change. I revel in those moments that remind me that I had something to love. Because someone who is loved, even when lost, is a beautiful thing. It’s not something to take lightly. Because as much as negative events are life changing, those moments that are captured in love are life-giving. And they give us life that, no matter what happens, cannot be taken from us. Because they give us a life in the Spirit. They show us glimpses of love that we don’t often experience.
No matter what anyone says, tears are healing. Because it’s those moments in which tears are shed that we are reminded that something or someone meant something to us. They probably still do. They arguably always will. Because love, whether romantic or platonic, may never truly go away. It may numb, or it may change, but I’m not sure you can just expel something from your heart. I’m not sure that’s how God made us. I’m not sure He wired us to view the things we love as being disposable or temporary. Though I think He’s granted us the knowledge that their physical existence may fade, I think He’s endowed us with the inherent capacity to combine our own existence with that of another, even if only in spirit. Because though hearts may stop and feelings may change, a place in someone’s heart is not something you rent. It’s something you keep. It’s something you change by touching it with your own unique love.
Smiles are beautiful. They’re something I have a hard time forgetting about people. And I love that. I love that God grants me the ability to remember positive things about people whose existence in my own life was imperfect. I love that He’s constantly reminding me that I have a reason to love people. Even if it’s just one smile. Or one laugh. Or a few words. Because, oddly enough, when people are gone those are the things you grow to remember. The small things. The small things grow to define their entire interaction with you. And the small things, just as fast as life knocked you down, have a way of picking you up. They place their hand under your chin and slowly tilt your lovely face up to God, because we forgot in our own troubles. We forgot how much God longs to see our smile.
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” – Joshua 1:9
P.S. You are enough.