Revealing the Myths of Therapy

oct 11

By Maura Byrne | Founder of Made in His Image

Thousands of men and women have written to MIHI to express their fear in getting help and going to therapy. I want to be vulnerable with you and share part of my story. It is my hope that God will use it to inspire those who need professional help to seek it out. Years ago I was very sick and didn’t know what was wrong with me. I went to IPS (Institute for the Psychological Sciences) in Arlington, Virginia. While there, I participated in two full days of intensive psychological testing. It was one of the most emotionally and physically draining things I have ever encountered. Several weeks later, I went back to hear my results. I was diagnosed with chronic post traumatic stress disorder due to past trauma. Three doctors recommended for me to engage in intensive trauma therapy for two years.

The thought of getting help and going to talk to someone almost paralyzed me. I was petrified. Why should I go and reveal my heart and soul to a psychologist? In my naiveness, I convinced myself that:

1. They will never understand.

2. I don’t even know how to form words to describe how much it hurts to a friend, let alone a stranger.

3. I can’t afford it.

4. I’m scared and the thought of talking to someone makes me shake with nervousness. I actually think I might pass out.

5. What if the people who hurt me find out that I told?

6. If I get help I’m displaying a sign of weakness.

Well, after completing therapy I can tell you from my heart that:

1. There are doctors that genuinely care and understand. They might not have experienced the same difficulties you have, but are trained extensively to help you. It takes tremendous faith and trust on your part to trust them.

2. There are countless ways to express your pain and struggles. It will take time, but you can start slowly and build up to revealing more. You can also draw as well to express your feelings, trauma and emotions. Art therapy is very common and helped me tremendously.

3. I worked 7 days a week in the beginning to pay for the care I needed. In addition, I was awe-struck at the generosity of my doctors who made my care affordable for me. Two doctors never even sent me a bill for thousands of dollars of care they administered. They wrote off the entire bill. One receptionist told me, I don’t know who you are but in his twenty-five years of practice I have never seen him not bill a patient. People genuinely want to help and it’s good for wounded hearts to receive love through others generosity.

4. It’s okay to be scared. I would actually be concerned if you weren’t. When I first met my doctor I was terrified. I had only spoken with him once on the phone and the sound of his voice frightened me. I knew God wanted me to see him; I knew in my heart He wanted me to take this leap of faith. So I packed everything I owned into my Honda Accord and moved to Tennessee. If it didn’t fit in my car I left it behind. The first time I met my doctor in person, I knew everything was going to be okay. He was one of the most gentle, patient, faithful and educated doctors I had ever encountered. Was I still scared despite those characteristics I listed about him? Of course, as that is only natural, but sometimes, we are our own worst enemies. We need to learn to trust those who are deserving of our trust.

After God, I credit him for my healing. Made in His Image would never have been possible without him.

5. Contrary to what I thought, you are exhibiting tremendous courage and strength in seeking out professional help. It might not feel as if you are, but you are. Your vulnerability, bravery, determination and perseverance will shine through the darkness, it simply takes time. Be patient with yourself.

When I sat in Arlington, Virginia at the Institute for the Psychological Sciences (IPS) Dr. Kathryn Benes compared me to a solider returning from war. Dr. Benes is the Director of the Catholic-based Psychology Ministry at Catholic Charities in the Archdiocese of Denver. Prior to moving to Colorado, she served as an Associate Professor and the Director of the training Clinic at the Institute for the Psychological Sciences. Dr. Benes also developed a nationally recognized, diocesan-wide mental health program that ultimately became a doctoral-level psychology internship site in the Nebraska Internship Consortium in Psychology, an institution accredited by the American Psychological Association (APA). This program is currently the only APA-accredited internship site in the nation that is specifically designed to train psychologists from a Catholic perspective.Seeing Dr. Benes’ credentials and hearing what she said about me helped reshape my thought process. I kept telling myself, If she says I need this help, then I must need it. She is the professional, not me. 

Why didn’t I see myself as worthy of the same care? Why wasn’t I good enough to receive help? 

I wrestled with those thoughts and came to discover my dignity as His daughter worthy of recovery. God the Father desired nothing more than to provide, protect and take care of me in my illness and beyond and His generosity is boundless. He simply asks us to trust Him.

He yearns to give you the same. Do you trust Him?

P.S. You are enough.

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