When We Stop Chasing Men

By Maura Preszler

I use to chase men in college. I did it for attention. I did it because I desired to be known, loved, seen and understood. Those are all good desires, I just sought out those desires when I should have been more focused on becoming the best version of myself for my future spouse. It brought me to a low point which brought me to Jesus.


I get a lot of messages from women about relationship advice. I am certainly no expert but I will tell you that when I stopped chasing men, the man God had for me chased me.


My dating relationship with my now husband certainly wasn’t perfect. We dated for a while. We broke up. Michael needed to discern the religious life. I was really hurt. We both grew so much while we were apart. In my heart I knew I was going to marry Michael. Other men asked me out but I said no because I loved Michael and wasn’t ready. I texted and called Michael when I shouldn’t of. He was always really kind but looking back I see I was only hurting myself further with each text and call.


The breakup became so hard for me that I worked a tremendous amount of overtime and flew to Nashville, TN to see the doctor who helped me with my recovery. We had several sessions each day for the three days I was in town. I needed him to remind me to let Michael go. And that if it was indeed God’s will, Michael would come back.


Michael did come back to California from his time discerning his vocation with the CFR’s in New York City. He called me and asked if I wanted to go pick a pumpkin and make a pie together. I said absolutely not unless it was a date. I knew my heart couldn’t handle being Michael’s friend. He said it was a date and we went. 8 months later we were married. And now we have two precious little boys.


What I want to tell you tonight is, stop chasing a guy and let him chase you. When we stop chasing we allow ourselves to be chased. And this is what you deserve.


You deserved to be pursed. You deserve to be chased. You deserve to be loved just as you are. You are worthy of love. Be patient with the process. God hasn’t forgotten you. I promise.

P.S. You are enough.

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